Expect your emotions to fluctuate hour-by-hour. In the initial weeks or months after discovery of your partner's affair, I encourage you to treat yourself as if you had the flu. When we are physically sick, we are more likely to understand our limits, nourish ourselves, and get lots of rest. That's what you need. Your heart has gone through an immense shock of betrayal, and your entire system is feeling ill.

I'm writing this as I wrap up an individual therapy session. I feel this often... A profound sense of vulnerability that is built in therapy sessions. I have seen some of my clients for years. For others, it has been only months. But in all cases, when the therapeutic relationship is the right fit, there is a sense of knowing and connection that develops. This is not friendship, but it is something much deeper: unfiltered humanity.